I think every time we get focused on something and stuck on it for so long that we feel like we’re drowning, we should all just listen to Modest Mouse’s “Float On” really loudly until we feel better. That always seems to work for me—at least temporarily.

If we can’t float on just yet, perhaps we need to work on simply moving on.  I’ve just been full of normally rare epiphanies this week—probably because I spent half of it ill and reading books in the bathroom—and one that I realized was that holding onto some very bitter entanglements was not serving me. In fact, it was holding me back.

Two expectations in particular have been really causing me great bitterness and sorrow. One was the promise a friend made—years ago!—that I somehow think will still happen someday. I keep expecting something in the mail, or maybe a phone call from her, that never comes. I put some work into this expectation and therefore think something’s going to come of it—but I really just need to cut my losses and move on.

The other big expectation I hold is similar—it stems from something I put a whole lot of work and time into. It was something I did for a relative, though it was not a favor; we had agreed upon the compensation I would receive in return. And while I fulfilled my end of the bargain, I have yet to receive hers. I feel so bitter and angry over this—and again, it’s been over a year since I put so many hours and so much energy into her project. I really helped her out, but I will not be receiving my compensation (which is not money, but services as well) in return. I suppose that’s where contracts come in, isn’t it?

Instead of gnawing my teeth every time I’m around these people or thinking of them, expectation hovering over my head like a dark cloud, I need to just. Let. It. Go. So I’m adding “Let It Go” to my Living To Do List today, and I’m letting go of these notions. If they come to pass, that would be wonderful; if not, oh well. I refuse to hold my breath anymore.

I’m sure there’s something in your life you could just let go of—a toxic friend, an old flame, the promise made years ago by a parent or sibling… May we experience peace and lightness when we release these things from our lives.